Sunday vibes

What a nice day, watching football and series, eating fruit and not feeling guilty. I had 50 grams of popcorn during the match and oh my god I am so stuffed, seriously what kind of popcorn was that.

Afterwards I chilled in my room for a bit then mum came into my room and asked if it was okay if she sat on my bed for a bit. We talked for hours about a lot of stuff which was nice. She just told me it was now time for me to eat my dinner which slightly infuriated me because I am not a toddler but then again it’s totally understandable considering my ED. I fixed myself a plate despite feeling stuffed and I ate it, I can’t bear to see that look of hurt on my mum’s face when I refuse to eat. I can see how defeated she feels as a parent and I have been seeing that face for years and it haunts me. I make sure I eat my meals when she’s home even if I don’t want to because the feeling of hurting/disappointing her by not eating is worse than the guilt of having a belly full of food.

On another note, I finally finished my assignment on Thursday night and I submitted it on Friday morning. I just hope I am on the right track, I thought about emailing my supervisor but I was so clueless on everything I did not even know what to ask. I followed the instructions as they were and I am 60% confident. The assignment is worth 50% of my year mark and 15% of my final mark so yeah it’s totally not a big deal. The others are already in study groups helping each other but I seem to be the only one in the class who chose the particular topic I am researching, just my luck… at least I enjoy the topic it would have been awful if I had chosen a topic everyone is doing and the topic turned out to be a bore. I have another assignment due in 2 weeks worth 50% of my year mark and 15% of my final mark, woah the days should stop moving so fast.

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