ReJection is okay

Rejection is okay

Yes it really is.

Ever since I was young I have always wanted to be a model. I am 22 years old and in the  modelling industry I am a dinosaur. I went to a casting today for a fashion week event to be held in August (Not a major event though). Heels and a blazer, I felt so smart in my attire and so driven. It was one of those now or never kind of things so I owed it to myself to go whatever the outcome would be. I almost didn’t go, would they think I am too fat? Is it a good idea especially with my ED etc

So I got my chance to audition and I must admit my walk my atrocious as compared to the other girls. The other girls were thinner and I just wanted my hips to shrink. It’s funny though, a person like me with an eating disorder going to a casting throwing myself to the wolves were I know I could be triggered because of other thinner girls and placing myself up for my body being scrutinized but I wasn’t triggered or emotional it was just one of those it is what it is situations.

On my walk home I think I accepted that we are all created different but I haven’t made peace with it and it still stings because it’s so. I don’t think I’ll get a call back, they let down easy saying I was too short (I am 171cm & they were looking for 176cm and up) and that they would “re-evaluate”. Not holding my breath, it was an experience but I am not done. I will go to other castings especially those that aren’t strict in terms of height and measurements. I don’t want to be this super model, I just want a taste of my childhood dream and if I get rejected it’s OKAY because a decade from now I’ll look back and say “hey at least I tried and I put myself out there” as opposed to “I wish I had tried it out”. There is no greater sting on the heart than that of regret.

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2 thoughts on “ReJection is okay

  1. Keep pushing forward. I had to convert centimeters to feet because I had no idea how tall you were lol. So they would tell you no because you’re an inch too short? You should have brought me with you. I’m 5’10” (or around 181 cm) but I’m fat. They would have rather picked the skinny slightly shorter girl over the mammoth fat one, I assure you.

  2. Thanks I’ll keep pushing forward. They were very strict about the height thing an inch shorter you had no chance in hell. Woah 181cm you’re one tall girl & that’s a pretty cool height you must enjoy towering over everyone :).

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