It came and went

Christmas came and went and for the first time in years I was emotionally present, when I said merry Christmas I meant it and felt it unlike the previous years when it was something that just spilled out of my mouth without any sincerity attached to it.

Old habits die hard, my attempts to eat a plate of food in front of family was nothing short of pathetic but that’s alright. I of course binged and purged in private and binged some more on ice cream and pies, like I said old habits die hard. Despite of all that it has been a great couple of days, my heart was filled with warmth and that spirit of giving. I laughed, conversed and got out of the house, like some type of real person.

Tomorrow the studying resumes and I pray to God my knees won’t get weak and fail me when I am so close to the finish line. I have always been a slave to the finish line.

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